Give me my money, bitch!

We have been very bad, yes, very naughty, for not having updated our fantastical blog in a while. This shall change! You may spank us if you like. I know that Sp00neleh would like it. A lot.

On our behalf we would like to say that all our sympathies go out to the victims of the catastrophe in Japan.

Times are a-changing. This weekend I will be partying it up in Swedenland, Moose-style, so expect to see some crazy party pictures. HEhehe.

Damn, my feet have fallen asleep.

As you've probably heard, the starring actor of "Two and a Half Men" (which I think is s shit show anyways mainly 'cause I hate sitcoms), Charlie Sheen, has gone a bit bonkers. Here's a funny video he made which I personally think is better than anything he did on "Two and a Half Men" (again, mainly 'cause I hate sitcoms; so fucking unrealistic and NOT funny).

Charlie Sheen's Winning Recipes from Charlie Sheen

CheesestiCKZZz...on a Stick

Hummela, hummela cheesestiCkzz. I've never had a cheesestick. They sound yummy though.

I know there hasn't been anything posted here in a little while but Sp00neleh has been...occupied. Me? Well, I haven't been so fucked with boredom in a very long time. Perhaps never! Being bored has impaired my ability to be creative thus I have not produced any posts on this or my blog. This will change in about two-three weeks I hope (please, God!).

AAaanyway, today is the 3rd of March! Right now I am thinking about baNanas. Eew, not in THAT way. Get your minds out of the gutter! Tsssk...Bananas. This humble fruit almost seems like a miracle of anture. Nature. Not anture. It's colourful, nutritious and much loved by children, monkeys and clowns (I always connected bananas with elephants, I do not know why...). It has a favourable position in the planet's fruit bowls. It's vitally important in many regions of the tropics where some parts of the plant are used for clothing, paper and tableware. Imagine that your friend calls you and asks what you're wearing to the club. You say,"Yeah, I'm just wearing some banana peel!" Haha. It is a very fortuitious fruit. The banana is, however, a freakish and fragile genetic mutant. It's lovely banana-like appearance hides a fatal flaw which threatens its proud place in the grocery basket. A flaw that can be summed up in a single word: sex. Do not worry! Despite it's unfortunate sexual impotance, agriculturalists have realised and do know how to make grow them so they will still exist and have existed for the past many, many centuries. Go bananas!

God, I just spent the last 15 minutes writing about a banana's sex life. WTF. I need some sexy time.

How incredibly sad has my life become??

Cranium penetration.

Dub- step. Not quite music, not quite noise but filthy dirty. How else to describe the relentless pounding and bass so deep you feel like it's inside you? It's not passionate, theres no heat (except for the heaving bodies next to you). Dub- step is heavy, thick, sweltering. It isn't there to satisfy, it isn't quick enough to release the frustraion that dancing crazy to electro does. No, dub-step teases, pushes up against you, pulls your head back. You're sweaty, wound up by the endless depth of the sound that refuses to give you the drop. Then finally you give in, feeling it throb through you. Suddenly it's pressing everywhere till it gets into your ears, your chest, your head. It's under your skin, dragging up your back. It's ugly, so very very ugly. But so very very wet.

Illegal...Anus?

Hold onto your anuses!

Plug It In & Turn Me On

I want you to take over control, take over control...

This video says it all right now.

Where Dreams Become Heart Attacks

We all love to eat. All kinds of things. Sweet things and salt things. Burgers and sallads. Meatloaf and fish. All kinds of things. But we do have to limit ourselves or we will be cursed with clogged arteries, bad health in general. But maaan do we looove the food!

In America they love food too and I admire their creativity when it comes to creating some foodatistic masterpieces. But then again there's "Supersize Me".

I found some fun pictures of some foodstuff ideas in America that are really fun and original!

Pake= a pie inside a cake!

This one in particular is a lemon-vanilla cake with blueberry preserves, strawberry pie and cream-cheese frosting!

The Fat Monkey

This cake consists of two slices of chocolate chip banana bread, with layers of Nutella, bananas and marshmallow creme sandwich in between dipped in cake batter and then deep-fried then dipped in melted chocolate and rolled in toasted almonds and coconut! Whoo! That's a lot of goody yummy stuff stuffed in one cake!!

Deep-fried Milky Ways

The Americans have taught us that you can virtually deep-fry anything when you put your mind to it!

Oreo Scones

I love Oreos and I love Scones. What a perfect combination.

Inside-Out Spaghetti & Meatballs

As kids (or maybe even as adults) we've all once wished to witness a Giant Meatball. Well, here is one! A giant meatball filled with spaghetti, marinara sauce and ricotta cheese! NOM.

So if you wanna die an early death, eat one of these!

The Sex Panther

Breaded schnitzel, bacon, cheese, ham and steak in a hollowed out bun.

L0LOL0OLOL0OL

see more funny videos

Lending People Your Car

Well, since I don't have a license nor own a car, I do not have to worry about this matter! Wait, what you wanna borrow my car? What car? :S I'm confused...

Google is a great search engine but I just realised that even though it has helped me out at times with homework or writing essays or with books I didn't read for English, there has been more times, A LOT more times where it has failed me. Where it has  not succeeded in identifying what my search demands and therefore failed to come up with what I need. I sat for hours tonight trying to look for a simple red, vintage background. I found many vintage backgrounds and I found many red ones but NONE that were red AND vintage. This pissed me off. What pissed me off even more was that this isn't the first time that Google has forsaken me! Although Google is awesome and has become a part of our everyday language ("Just GOOGLE it!") I am beginning to doubt if it really is that great after all. Well, that is what I've experienced.

Mmm, sitting alone in this godforsaken room on a Friday night. God, I wish I was out, partying like crazy until dawn. I miss those times. I haven't partied since last year. This is very sad. I hope you guys are partying double as hard for me. Drinking jäger shots and making out with strangers in empty bathroom stalls!

OMG What a biiitch!

Sometimes I get really mad!

Some people are such bitches! Fucking whores. Especially girls. Guys can be whores too. Man-whores.

Some people are just AaRrarARGghH and I just want to smack them right across their faces with my spatula. The things some little bitch does sometimes (especially when it has to do with a guy you might like) can really REALLY annoy you sometimes. Then you call or text your best friend to tell her what little bitches are doing and you feel satisfied when you then get a text message back with the single word, "Whore." in it. This confirms (to some unrealistic extent) that you're not the only one who thinks the person's a little biatch who's annoying. Even though your best friend might not even know who this person is. But hey! that's what best friends are for; to make you feel better when you're annoyed and stand with you against the little bitchy, whory things some people in particular do.

The things going through your mind might be something like: "Oh HEEELLL NooO0!! She did NOT just do that! DaAMn I just wanna AAARghhgGH. Fucking bitch! Whore!" You get out your mobile and start furiously texting lots of other french words that might describe what you are feeling ad what you think about this person who has annoyed you.

If someone hits on someone you like=whore.
If someone is together with someone you like=mega whore.
If that someone that's together with the person that you wanna do against the kitchen counter and doesn't let you fucking forget it=super mega fu*cking whore slut @**2'2' aaarGhG I beat you with my spatulaaaaAaaa

Whoo I feel better now :]